New today on the web

Its hard keeping up to everything that is happening on the web.    There are so many new sites popping up its impossible to stay relevant.   Who has time?... People are now site dropping... It is equivalent to name dropping in the “old” days.    Its tiring and I now find myself nodding my head like I know what they are talking about.  The truth is,  I have trouble reading all of my own emails and keeping up with face-book.   More importantly....I don’t want anymore irrelevant email.     Sometimes it is good to go old school... Fake it until you make it... or until you get a chance to google it on your phone.. 

Tapas.... Not just a spanish dish

7 days ago we were handed homework leaving yoga training it was to decide on a tapas and commit.  As I left the studio I  thought my gurus had lost their minds.  Tapas are a spanish food dish, what was there to decide... but to my surprise  Sanskrit  has tapas too. Wikipedia definition  is "heat", refers to a personal endeavor of discipline, undertaken to achieve a goal, accompanying suffering and pain”.   Why do I want to do anything that causes me suffering and pain?  These yogis are really putting me to the test.  As I stuffed a handful of M & M’s in my mouth, I couldn’t really think of what I could do to myself other than taking away my starbucks.  That would just cause suffering and pain to my family.  Caffeine is life support.  Then as my hand reached for the swedish berries, it dawned on me.. I love candy.  If candy is shaped like a fruit it is one...Right?     So here is my Tapas, I am off of refined sugar for 14 days.  No candy, cupcakes, or ice-cream..... I feel pain already.  Day one down, 13 to go.  Yogis!  Seriously.. Bring on the Spaniards!

Muppets back on the big screen

I got to take the girls to the movies today. They didn’t want to go, but I had a temper tantrum and made them come. My favorite childhood show “The Muppets” were back on the big screen and not in 3D. Quite frankly I find 3D distracting. Having to wear the glasses, waiting for the next thing to jump out, gives me a nervous twitch. As we waited for the movie to start, watching the 15 min of previews, it occurred to me that I enjoy PG movies more that adult movies. Kids movies are about friendship, learning lessons and finding out who you are. Everything I am working on. Adult movies are about love triangles, violence or vampires. I haven’t seen a adult movie in the last year that I walked away thinking it was worth my time or money. The Muppets on big screen, hanging with my girls having some straight up belly laughs over ridiculous 80‘s humor. I walked out singing a old muppet classic, brings me back to my childhood. Now that’s a Sunday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8N_tupPBtWQ

Muppet Show - Mahna Mahna...m HD 720p bacco... Original!

www.youtube.com

Mahna Mahna Muppet Show original song HD 720p

Anxious bus

The anxious bus came along today, ran me over, backed up and rolled over me again and for no particular reason. Being anxious is a terrible feeling, there is a great heaviness on the chest and my thoughts are not reasonable.. Quite frankly its almost paralyzing. I went through the inventory of self help books nothing... then to ..the internet for meditations... How can you meditate when my heart is pounding?.. I love distraction so I jumped in my car and headed off to a friends. As soon as I sat down in her kitchen, a few laughs and great conversation my condition was forgotten.. I am not sure if it was misery loves company or forget your troubles.... I’ll take both and a spoon full of laughter.

This is my story

“This is my story” was the opening line tonight at my 17 year old daughters high school play.  It was powerful..   There was a profound moment as my jaw was hanging down..  staring at my daughter and her friends.... They nailed it.. and they are in High School.      At 43, conversations with my friends revolve around a need to be heard and to be seen.  Not as mothers, as volunteers, or in our careers but for who we are underneath all the labels.  Then in front of me was a cast of High School students talking about the exact same thing.    We are two different generations looking for who we are and being accepted for it.    Maybe they have uncovered the secret to their lives at a early age... To be who they truly are, not wrapped up in what anyone else thinks.      The greatest gift you could ever give yourself is to listen to your own teacher.  The one that tells you who you are.  Believe... It saves decades of time in self doubt and barrels of money in counseling...Just saying from 4 decades experience. 

Just like my mom

Where’s my Mommy!  I am wondering as I sat down to write this blog.  She has been traveling in the USA with her friend for over a week.   The woman is 75 and the grass doesn’t go green under her feet.  For some reason she still believes that long distance charges are similar in cost to traveling to the moon.   I don’t expect to hear from her everyday, but a check in would be nice.  I just want to know that she didn’t buy another time share, marry a 90 year old man or get lost on a bus tour.   I make my daughters check in and now I am going to have to put my own mother on notice.   I can’t believe what just happened...  the tables have turned and now I am keeping tabs on my mom... OMG, soon I will be watching curling and talking about the price of butter.  It’s the evolution of the woman, we slowly turn into our mothers... Good thing I am so fantastic, my girls should look forward to being exactly like me!

flowing with fear

Why does fear cripple us? We all have some sort of fear in our lives and it manifests in different ways. I know when I have to make a major decision in my life, I always find a new project to distract myself. I almost took a job at the Mac store today in a effort to self sabotage my own personal project... Karma Sisters. I now can recognize my trigger. I am the master of over doing... I heard from another friend who spent the day physically ill, paralyzed and silent in her own fear. Got me thinking about life is like a river. Every river has a beautiful calm spot where the birds are singing and the water is crisp, clean and inviting. As you venture further down, a giant log jam appears just enough to put you on guard. Then of course, you hear the rushing of the water and suddenly the pace of the water picks up. You know your approaching a steep waterfall and its life or death. You can grasp all the branches you want but your going over. Fighting only makes it worse, sometimes you have to just go with the flow. The greatest glory is looking from the bottom of the falls. The sound of the water, the vapors drifting and the pristine pool of water. To me that is conquering the fear, when you get to look back and say I did it. I survived and I am ok.